PLEASE DON’T FEED THE CHILDREN (2024)

3 stars

Signature Entertainment. Digital. Available Now DVD 20 October.

A virus is running rife. It turns people into cannibals. It seems it is carried by children, with most asymptomatic when bitten. Millions have been affected with no cure. Immediate death of anyone infected to stop the spread. Kids have been rounded up and put into camps.

Mary (Zoe Coletti) tries to not get caught. She is spotted, but is saved by Jeffy (Dean Scott Vazquez) who takes her to meet the rest of his gang – Ben (Andrew Liner), Crystal (Emma Meisel), Seth (Joshuah Melnick) and Vicky (Regan Aaliyah). Mary is trying to get to the border – inevitably the group is somewhat suspicious of her. When they hear a report over the radio, they end up on the run in their car…

Initially a great setup – but then it changes tack. Trying to steal some food from a petrol station shop, Ben ends up injured when he is shot. They just about get away but the car runs out of gas – they need help when they see a big house which they hope is abandoned. Instead they trip the alarms and are greeted by Clara (Michelle Dockery, thankfully not attempting a US accent). She says she’ll take a look, as she is a nurse, and stitches Ben up. She seems friendly enough if a bit ‘off’. Then she offers them cookies – and they collapse as the sweet treat is drugged.

With several of them locked in the attic and Seth shoved into what appears to be a metal tank of some kind, Mary is the only one who gets off lightly, as she wakes up in one of the bedrooms and soon realises that Clara sees her as a substitute for her dead daughter.

What is Clara up to – what is her agenda… Is she some kind of psycho? She constantly speaks of her husband Hank – who we assume is dead. Or is he? What fate awaits these teens – we know it isn’t good.

The problem here is things drag as the story unfolds. There is some tension created when Vicky tries to find a way out. Dockery is certainly far away from the posh environs of Downton Abbey! Her character takes glee in what she is doing to her captive children as she vacillates from being friendly to bursts of anger.

Written by Paul Bertino this was directed by Destry Allyn Spielberg – yep, one of Steven Spielberg and Kate Capshaw’s children… This film is certainly darker than most of her father’s outings and eventually leads to a violent, bloody and ultimately bleak finale.

Steve Kirkham