GOD OF FROGS

3 stars

Miracle Media. Digital. 2nd March

This is a multi story anthology – with none of the stories particularly engaging.

The first is called ‘Mother of All Fogs’ and set in 1969: we are at a free spirited hippy commune – one of the women hears the woods ‘calling her’. Wandering off she makes love to what she thinks is their guru but turns out to be some sort of slimy, froggy, creature from the black lagoon style monster. Who doesn’t love an old school man in a suit pretending to be an amphibian creature. She ends up swiftly pregnant. She is the chosen one. You can guess what she gives birth to…

The second tale is in 1994 and called ‘God of the Bog’ – which doesn’t mean a deity emanating from a toilet. Sadly.

Film students head off to Florida. Stopping at a roadside diner they see a naked man repeating ‘God of the Bog’. Weird much? They head into the middle of nowhere and set up camp. The slightly odd Brett turns up – he is there as their guide to the swamplands. He tells them all about the aforementioned God! Which you know probably isn’t good…

We are then in 2019 for ‘Beelzebufo’. In this one, which was somewhat confusing, there is talk of a compound which can be extracted from frogs and could lead to riches. One of the investors is then involved in a helicopter crash with him and his son surviving. They find an abandoned store to sleep the night – the next day Dad starts to act strangely.

Our final outing ‘Farm to Table’ is set in the future of 2044 and was even more confusing. Lillian works at a factory in packing. Visit from corporate office. Then the lights flicker and there is the sound of a scream – what has happened? Features a baby frog monster.

The quartet of stories here have various writers and directors bringing them to the screen and they do sort of interconnect. At least I think they were meant to. All are competently enough made and the acting isn’t terrible but none of the stories are outstanding. But hey it does have a rubber monster…

Steve Kirkham